Tina sighed and lamented the dark episode that has been her marriage for the past 10 months since she found out about the affair. Since that time she said we have both been trying to put the pieces of our marriage back together.
"The period before and after
the time of Dan's fling had been very difficult to deal with and I have wished
on many an occasion AmoLatina.com that I could simply erase the thoughts and memories
of that time from my mind".
If Tina's story sounds familiar to
you and you feel like you have barely scraped through a horrific episode in
your life like this then you should first of all give yourself a pat on the
back because dealing with the aftermath of an affair can be really difficult.
The is no doubt however that coming
through an episode like this can leave your mind in tatters with your
imagination working overtime to fill in the gaps in the story line.
The following thoughts may even
enter your mind when you think about the affair.
1) Could I have behaved
differently?
2) What was stopping me knowing
what was happening
3) If I had married another person
would this not have happened?
4) I wonder if they shared laughter
and walks together during the affair
This blog is going to help you to
deal with the impact of these memories and the impact that the affair has had
on your psyche. MeetMe.com review I will
then provide you with three steps that you can use to cope with the painful
memories.
If you think back over your life
you will notice that the texture of your life is interwoven with a series of
memories. However, not all memories are created equal as they will be filed
away according to the emotional impact that they had on you at the time of
formation. The filing system of memories will contain everything that you have
experienced in life including all the painful emotional charged memories.
The emotionally charged memories
will of course be more alive in your mind and will be easier to recall because
they will have had an emotional impact on you at the time of formation, and the
memories that are associated with marriage upheaval or your spouse having an affair
will be very emotionally laden and full of energy.
The fact the these memories are
things that we have experienced that are in the past does not mean that your
mind is done with them as if you experience a trigger in the form of a smell, Eurodate taste or sound for example, you can be right back
there in the memory again, re-living the experience again.
You can start to regain control
over these memories by deciding to accept them and that these are events that
you cannot change. Dealing with these unpleasant memories is part of life and
something that we all have to cope with everyday.
The following however will help you
to cope with an unpleasant memory when it comes into your mind's eye.
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